Talk Nerdy to Me
by Madison Barton-Maximoff
Summary: Spencer falls in love with someone very unexpected.
1. Chapter 1

Talk Nerdy to Me

* * *

 **I do not own Criminal Minds in any way.**

"Remind me again why you're dragging me to work with you?" Harley asked Gideon.

He simply turned to her and smirked. "You'll see", he said. He led them into a conference room, where everyone looked up. "Everyone, meet Lily Dyer, my niece", Gideon said.

"Ugh, please call me Harley", she said popping her bubblegum, "Nice to meetcha". She sat in the chair next to Morgan and threw her combat boot covered feet on the table.

Gideon knocked her feet down and said, "I've brought her in to help on the case".

Spencer looked up at her. "You like to be called Harley because of Harley Quinn, correct?" he asked her.

"Who are you, Sherlock Holmes?" she sneered.

"You have blonde hair put up in pigtails, obviously not your natural hair color. Someone with features like yours most likely has a darker hair color. Harlequin diamond necklace. Another ode to Harley Quinn. You're also blowing and popping your gum rather loudly", he said.

"You employed Rainman?" Harley asked.

Spencer furrowed his brows at her.

Hotch stopped him before he could say anything. "We'll need to speak to the victims' families and another group of us needs to go over to the crime scenes again to find additional clues", he said.

"I'll stay here and go over the clue we already have", Spencer said.

"Harley, stay here with Reid", Gideon said.

"What?! You're going to leave me here with Jimmy Neutron!?" she whined.

Gideon simply smirked and walked out with the others.

"You know they're going to kill each other right?" Hotch said.

"I'm counting on it", Gideon said smiling.

* * *

Harley spent the next few minutes spinning in a chair as Spencer watched her.

He found her incredibly annoying, but adorable at the same time.

She had a childlike demeanor that Spencer wished he could have. When she stopped spinning, she got up and tried doing handstands using the wall to support her.

"You're very annoying", Spencer told her.

"Sticks and stones, love", she said sticking her tongue out at him. Harley continued to stare at the board upside down until a thought struck her.

Spencer couldn't help but notice that she was wearing incredibly short shorts that showed off a large amount of her legs. "The murderer had an accomplice", she told him.

"What?" Spencer asked.

Harley rolled her eyes and grabbed pictures off the board. "Okay, so obviously guys have more violence in their crimes, correct?"

Spencer nodded.

"Women are most known for what? Poisoning their victims? Crimes of passion? Look at the anger in these pictures. Obviously a man did this. The letters? Written by a woman. DNA? A woman's. The fact that the murder weapons were hidden in small nooks and crannies. Most women have small hands that can fit places men's can't".

Spencer was impressed by her knowledge.

Harley rolled her eyes and said, "Don't look at me like that. Gideon is my uncle and I had a boyfriend who used to make me help him work on his car".

"So how come this woman is helping him?" Spencer asked.

"Why does Harley help the Joker? Because she's completely in love with him. She'll do anything he asks her to", she said.

"So you think we've got a modern day Joker and Harley Quinn on our hands?" Spencer asked her.

"It would explain everything else. The playing cards left at the scenes, mostly notably the Joker and the Queen of Hearts. The fact that most of the crime scenes closely resemble some of their victims in the comics…"

"So…if you had to…"

"The Riddler", she told him.

Spencer smiled. "Most people find him incredibly annoying due to the face that he speaks in riddles".

Harley shrugged and said, "I think it's cute".

The team walked through the door.

"Wow. You two didn't kill each other. I'm surprised!" Morgan said.

"You ready to go?" Gideon asked.

"Ready when you are", she said.

Gideon went to his office to grab his jacket.

"Oh, before we go…" she said. She placed her hands on Spencer's chair and said, "I can break, I can be clogged, I can be attacked, I can be given, I can be kept, I can be crushed yet I can be whole at the same time. What am I?" she asked.

Spencer smiled and winked at him before leaving with her uncle.

"Whew! I can feel the tension!" Morgan teased as Reid's face went bright red. "What are you waiting for? Go get her pretty boy".

Reid shot out of his seat and ran for the elevator. He reached the parking lot as Gideon and Harley were getting into their car.

"Harley!" Spencer called.

Harley turned and before she could say anything, Reid's lips were on hers.

"Go on a date with me", he said.

Harley smiled and said, "Okay".

"Okay", Spencer said and walked back into the building.

Harley turned to Gideon and said, "You set us up didn't you?"

Gideon just smiled. "Get in the car".


	2. NEW STORY

I've started a full length Spencer fic. It's called "Harlequin" and I don't know how many chapters it will have, but I will try to complete it sometime this week.


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